With my birthday coming up this week (it’s Thursday, and they have some fun cards at the bookstore, hint, hint), I’ve been thinking over the accumulated wisdom of my 36 long years on this Earth. Here are some gems I culled from the collection (i.e. made up just now):
1. Life is like a box of donuts. You can’t avoid getting greasy and sticky if you’re doing it right.
2. You can eat donuts and lose weight. Ask me how.
3. People tell you the most enjoyable things in life (donuts, motorcycles, mountain biking) will kill you, then waste their lives with a bag of chips and “Survivor”. Frankly, I’d rather go out the way my grandfather did: ramping his motorcycle over a big pile of mountain bikes and donuts.
4. No one ever came to Wednesday Donuts and regretted that they didn’t spend the time with their computer instead.
Wednesday Donuts, back in LAP S185. 10:00.
-MLJ
PS-> Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. John Berges. Dr. Berges is like a real-life most interesting man in the world. He’s from an exotic foreign country (Canada), he’s married to an exotic foreign beauty (from the Southern Hemisphere, no less), and he’s lived in a lot of exotic places (Wisconsin, Canada, Scandinavia). He’s also very generous with his exotic money (he supports donuts). Exotic.
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Success in the workplace: Donuts
Just thought I’d share a few tips for success at work that I’ve picked up over my long career:
1. Send emails (like this one) at crazy hours of night or really early in the morning so that people think you work absurdly long hours.
2. Get a helper monkey to answer the phone. If no monkeys are available, an undergraduate will work nearly as well.
3. Organize a weekly event involving donuts. Get someone else to set up the event, and recruit volunteers to pay the costs. Then, send out an irreverent invitation each week, with your name and websites all over it, so that you get all the glory (such as it is).
-MLJ
PS->Donuts this week courtesy the Alberto Lab’s own Sara Schaal. Although Sara spells her name the evil way, with no H, she is actually a pretty good person. Before she came to work in the lab, she operated her own knife-fighting academy out of her basement. That’s why she’s so great at slicing donuts. Ask to see her moves at your own risk.
1. Send emails (like this one) at crazy hours of night or really early in the morning so that people think you work absurdly long hours.
2. Get a helper monkey to answer the phone. If no monkeys are available, an undergraduate will work nearly as well.
3. Organize a weekly event involving donuts. Get someone else to set up the event, and recruit volunteers to pay the costs. Then, send out an irreverent invitation each week, with your name and websites all over it, so that you get all the glory (such as it is).
-MLJ
PS->Donuts this week courtesy the Alberto Lab’s own Sara Schaal. Although Sara spells her name the evil way, with no H, she is actually a pretty good person. Before she came to work in the lab, she operated her own knife-fighting academy out of her basement. That’s why she’s so great at slicing donuts. Ask to see her moves at your own risk.
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Donut Workout, Part 1
Since I bike past the Klotsche Center every day, I consider myself something of a fitness expert. So, I’ve decided to put together a workout we can do to make room for extra donuts.
Today’s exercise: Donut Bicep Curls
Start with a half donut in each hand, elbows and forearms resting on the table. Advanced fitness types can use whole donuts. Alternating hands, raise the donut to your mouth and take a small bite (the donuts have to last the whole set), then lower your arms to the table. That’s one rep. Repeat for 8-10 reps. Grab more donuts and repeat for three sets.
We can all practice together at Wednesday Donuts. 10am, LAP S185.
-MLJ
PS-> Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. Julie Oliver. Dr. Oliver doesn’t often make it to donuts, but she is a long-standing supporter of the concept (and now, of the actual event). She’s also an excellent scientist. Also, she once met Ringo Starr at Heathrow Airport. So, good stuff all ‘round. Thanks, Dr. Oliver!
Today’s exercise: Donut Bicep Curls
Start with a half donut in each hand, elbows and forearms resting on the table. Advanced fitness types can use whole donuts. Alternating hands, raise the donut to your mouth and take a small bite (the donuts have to last the whole set), then lower your arms to the table. That’s one rep. Repeat for 8-10 reps. Grab more donuts and repeat for three sets.
We can all practice together at Wednesday Donuts. 10am, LAP S185.
-MLJ
PS-> Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. Julie Oliver. Dr. Oliver doesn’t often make it to donuts, but she is a long-standing supporter of the concept (and now, of the actual event). She’s also an excellent scientist. Also, she once met Ringo Starr at Heathrow Airport. So, good stuff all ‘round. Thanks, Dr. Oliver!
Tuesday, June 4, 2013
Donut Telegram from Heidi!
I got this telegram from Heidi yesterday, thought I’d share it with you all.
ML709 7 NM=MILWAUKEE WI 35
MATTIAS JOHANSSON
UW MILWAUKEE
SAMPLING IS GOING WELL -(STOP)- CALIFORNIA IS BEAUTIFUL -(STOP)- BUT MISS WEDNESDAY DONUTS -(STOP)- ALSO MISS FRIENDS AND LABBIES -(STOP)- BUYING MY OWN DONUTS IS ANNOYING -(STOP)- KEEP ACCIDENTALLY BUYING THREE DOZEN -(STOP)- BOBBY ONLY EATS TWO -(STOP)- I EAT THE REST -(STOP)- THEN I FEEL SEASICK -(STOP)- EVEN IN THE LAB -(STOP)- HOPE ALL IS WELL IN WISCONSIN -(STOP)- CAN NOT GET A DECENT PIECE OF CHEESE HERE -(STOP)- ALL MY BEST TO NELSON, KRISTEN, AND BUNNY -(STOP)-
HEIDI HARGARTEN.
Wednesday Donuts, 10am, LAP S185.
-MLJ
PS->Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. Mark McBride. Dr. McBride is internationally famous for hosting “Mark McBride Presents: Biology Colloquium” every Friday during the term. His in-depth introduction technique has been known to upstage many a speaker, and always leaves audiences demanding more. But, Dr. McBride is also modest, and consistently and generously refuses to take over the presentation every week. Dr. McBride’s generosity also comes out in his unwavering support of Wednesday Donuts. Thanks, Mark!
ML709 7 NM=MILWAUKEE WI 35
MATTIAS JOHANSSON
UW MILWAUKEE
SAMPLING IS GOING WELL -(STOP)- CALIFORNIA IS BEAUTIFUL -(STOP)- BUT MISS WEDNESDAY DONUTS -(STOP)- ALSO MISS FRIENDS AND LABBIES -(STOP)- BUYING MY OWN DONUTS IS ANNOYING -(STOP)- KEEP ACCIDENTALLY BUYING THREE DOZEN -(STOP)- BOBBY ONLY EATS TWO -(STOP)- I EAT THE REST -(STOP)- THEN I FEEL SEASICK -(STOP)- EVEN IN THE LAB -(STOP)- HOPE ALL IS WELL IN WISCONSIN -(STOP)- CAN NOT GET A DECENT PIECE OF CHEESE HERE -(STOP)- ALL MY BEST TO NELSON, KRISTEN, AND BUNNY -(STOP)-
HEIDI HARGARTEN.
Wednesday Donuts, 10am, LAP S185.
-MLJ
PS->Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. Mark McBride. Dr. McBride is internationally famous for hosting “Mark McBride Presents: Biology Colloquium” every Friday during the term. His in-depth introduction technique has been known to upstage many a speaker, and always leaves audiences demanding more. But, Dr. McBride is also modest, and consistently and generously refuses to take over the presentation every week. Dr. McBride’s generosity also comes out in his unwavering support of Wednesday Donuts. Thanks, Mark!
Monday, June 3, 2013
Variable weather, steady donuts
I don’t know what’s going on with the weather lately… one minute you’re mountain biking in the sunshine, the next minute your underpants are soaked through by a thunderstorm on the walk to work (that might have been several minutes later, actually). That’s the beauty of donuts. It’s steady, reliable, and won’t soak your behind. Come enjoy some predictability. Wednesday, LAP S185, 10am.
-MLJ
PS->Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. Chuck Wimpee. Dr. Wimpee is a seasoned scientist, with a respectable mustache. He also remembers what it was like to be a grad student, and the value of free food (donuts, for example). That’s why he’s a longstanding supporter of Wednesday Donuts. It might not be the reason he’s a cool guy (that would be the mustache), but it definitely helps.
-MLJ
PS->Donuts this week courtesy of Dr. Chuck Wimpee. Dr. Wimpee is a seasoned scientist, with a respectable mustache. He also remembers what it was like to be a grad student, and the value of free food (donuts, for example). That’s why he’s a longstanding supporter of Wednesday Donuts. It might not be the reason he’s a cool guy (that would be the mustache), but it definitely helps.
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