Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Introducing Twilight Donut and Sleep Cruller

The HsO Division of Children’s Affairs is proud to announce two new sleep aids for children: Twilight Donut, and Sleep Cruller.

Twilight Donut projects donut stars and constellations onto the walls and ceiling of any room. Three flavor options—Chocolate, Maple, and Cream Filled—create a tranquil atmosphere. Shuts off automatically after 30 minutes. A donut map identifies the constellations. Runs on a mother’s love, and 3 AAA batteries (not included). Item #36688 $99.00

Sleep Cruller eases baby to sleep with three soothing sounds: mother’s heartbeat, frying donuts, cash register bell. Winner of the National Deep Frying Center Seal of Approval, this fluffy pastry cruller is the perfect nighttime companion. Attaches to crib with sticky frosting. On/Off switch, pushbutton sound selection, volume control, and battery-wasting never-stop feature. Takes 2 AA batteries (not included). Not washable. 11” long. Item #2785537 $99.00


Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Donut Gameshow Concepts

Donut Jeopardy
Concept: Like Jeopardy, except the questions are donut themed, and contestants eat a donut anytime they answer a question wrong or another contestant answers a Daily Double correctly.
Reason Rejected: Two contestants went into hyperglycemic shock after the pilot episode.

Donut Name-That-Tune
Concept: Contestants attempt to name classic donut-themed tunes based on the first few notes.
Reason Rejected: There aren’t any classic donut-themed tunes.

Donut Double Dare
Concept: Teams of children answer questions or dare the opposing team to answer them or complete a donut physical challenge. Final round consists of a series of donut challenges, completed by both teams.
Reason Rejected: Condemned by the American Obesity Association and American Medical Association.

Wheel of Donuts
Concept: Contestants attempt to win donuts by spinning the “Wheel of Donuts” and solving word puzzles.
Reason Rejected: Not Rejected. Currently the highest-rated game show in Canada.

With most of our concepts rejected, we’ve got lots of leftover donuts. Come help us deal with them this morning at 10:00 in the staff lounge.